Friday, 13 October 2023

6 Things I Learnt As Twin Mom

6 Things I learned newly as twin mom compared to single kid mom


Motherhood is the blessing and NOT everyone can have this privilege. Whether you are new mom or second time mom or third time mom, everytime you get to learn something new because every pregnancy is different and so baby too. This time with twin babies I learned  lots of things newly. Twin baby is very difficult motherhood era for me due to nuclear family set up. 



When you become second time mother you are more confident, right? You are NOT easily get panic when baby is crying. You know exactly what does your baby want ? Something like that happened to me too. I am pretty sure to handle everything by single handle - no - no - I am not alone, this time I have my 9 year old daughter and with her this twin motherhood journey was exciting and terrific. I am always grateful to the God for giving me my darling. 


When my elder ONE born I was emotional for  everything like cleanliness, baby food, baby bath, baby emotions etc. As compared to that,  this time I am barely care. I keep them crying because I know the reason and if I can't get back in that time . So let it be for some time. 😑😊 


Yes! Sometimes you have to be practical.


Things I learnt as a twin mom, that every mom should learn if possible. I can say this is the way you can enjoy your motherhood journey calmly. Yes. Calmly

It is quite difficult to be calm but with practice you can be a calm mom. Anger and irritation is the part of motherhood. I can't say we should avoid this. It is not at all possible. But we can minimise it. Because if we are happy then family is happy. 


Sharing what I learnt and survive 😜


Swaddling /Comfort: 


Your baby sleep well when you swaddle her or him properly. I had the experience, but this time I am so confident about it like the length of swaddling clothes, how to swaddle and how tight or loose you can swaddle and the most important how quickly you can swaddle the crying baby in a minute. My twins had 2 to 3 hour undisturbed sleep.  

I swaddled them after bath,  in the afternoon and mostly at night. I used to give swaddle less time when they felt uncomfortable. Baby's comfort is the most important thing which helps them in sleeping. 


Sleep schedule : 

This is totally new to me. With my older one I never took any efforts to have strict sleep schedule because I didn't need that. You can say as a new mom I  never keep HER away from me. So I never understand the importance of sleep schedule. 


I have been told from first day of my baby to have strict sleep schedule then only you can have REST! 


And I mean it. So I literally wrote sleep time of my babies in my diary. Due to Instagram I am able to know the sleep pattern of babies. I STUDY that and it is helpful.  I try to follow the strict schedule and so my babies were no more cranky. They had full sleep. I had quite manageable time. 


Now they are 15 months old and still we follow sleep schedule strictly. Current sleep schedule is after every 4 HR gap . Sleep May remain upto 2 HR and some time it stretches to 4 HR too with feeding.

Happy Me !


Connect to babies

This is new because I am able to connect with both of them. They are good observer and quick learner. I didn't teach them. They observe and follow. Talk, activity, songs, play are the part of connection. Babies love to connect with you. They eager to talk with you. They listen and understand. Yes, it is true. It is very important to take out time to set the connection. Because with twins daily schedule is quite hectic. 


Tandem Breastfeeding  twin 

When I was pregnant I was worried about feeding. How can I feed my both twins? I saw tons of video and try to educated myself. 


I learned Tandem feeding where you can feed your twins at the same time. The day I reached home after my hospital session, very first time I tried Tandem Feeding and voila. I succed!  Only difficulty was to burp them . But slowly I learnt that.


When my friend saw this they feel surprised and sometimes pitty. But I am happy that I can breastfeed them and both are healthy fulfilled. (Touch wood)😊


Your gut than everyone's advise

During this period I always trust my gutt. Yes! Mumma. Your gut feeling is always accurate 90% rather than any parenting books. Do not act even according to advice given by the visitors. They always told you their experience. Everyone motherhood journey is different. So listen, learn but don't apply blindly. Trust your instincts and your knowledge.



Let them free from you 


The more baby free from you more they learn to play independently. Try to give them floor time as much as possible. Being a twin mom it is very important to cuddle both of them. Cuddling, hugging and playing always together. They able to play more with each other.

Okay, let me confess, 

Twin motherhood is the most difficult journey for me. I cried a lot. Feel guilty and most of the times feel depressed too. 

But.

I reminded myself it was our decision. I was mentally prepared for this journey. And I was the most happiest person in my family when we came to know that we had twins.

Instead of that stress I concentrate - 

💜 To flow with current direction.

💜 Time is temporary.

💜 Every day is new challenge and it will end soon. 

💜 Tried to fill up every day with loads of love.

💜 Filled the home with lots of laughter, being connected with each other and every one work as a family. 

💜 Last but not the least less bothered about how my house look like? 




I kept my house baby friendly so my baby can move around the whole house and I don't need to check them on again and again. We put out all furniture in our balcony and make the room spacious.


Yes, it was difficult, for me and our family too. But the way these tiny human being watching me, depending on me, hug me and love me,  I forgot everything and charged automatically to be with them. 

I believe I am the lucky ones and so always grateful to the Universe for giving me the opportunity of twin motherhood. 

Comparatively I enjoyed this twin motherhood journey mindfully and this is the best phase of my life where I learnt lots of things which helps me to develop in a better human being. 


Question for the day?

Do you take life challenge positively? Do you cry more or challenge your self?



This post was created for the Blogaberry Creative (Monthly) Challenge.






©Neeta Kadam. This article and image are the property of Memory Flies. Any unauthorized use or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author is strictly prohibited.





15 comments:

  1. I know I am strong and love to challenge myself. But, I have to be dramatic first and cry about it :). I personally feel it is ok to melt down in front of our kids. They need to know we are not perfect and we are humans. We cannot always portray a perfect image to them then they end up thinking they need to be perfect like us which is not right. It is ok to not be ok and constantly tell my child what challenges I am facing so that he learns to adapt to any given situation and any type of person.

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    1. 👍 very true. Kids learn by observing.

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  2. Hey Neeta you are inspiration for many mothers and not just twin mothers. I am a new Mom and I agree there are situations where you start losing your temper and feel irritated and it happens with me too although I am not a twin mother managing work, house and baby together. Your tips enlighten me to take things in a positive way and these days I am craving for quality sleep and that is affecting my health. My Sister in law is a twin mommy but thankfully she got the privilege of 24 hrs double nanny which I am failing to get. Will make best possible effort to implement your suggestions in my life and will get back to you if I need more advise and I hope you will not mind. Till then take care and keep smiling.

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    Replies
    1. Sure Samata. I will be happy if my post inspiring you. Keep it mommy. Do not overstress. Time flew very fast. ❤️

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  3. Well, I do not have the privilege of being a mother, as I am single. However, my siblings are twins and I was thinking that my mother must have had a tough time. Though, we didn't realise it then, we do now. Your tips are so useful for moms as people are more vocal about their needs in the current times.

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  4. Motherhood is such an unique experience, indeed. As you rightly said, every pregnancy is different. There may be different complexity, different unanticipated difficulty and even the sex of child may be different. There is no point comparing pregnancies, like any other things in life, be it single child or twin baby pregnancies.

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  5. How deeply honest and personal this is, Neeta
    Thanks for sharing your motherhood journey and tips with the world :)

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  6. Being a twin mom sounds like an incredible journey! I can only imagine how challenging and rewarding it must be. Learning to trust your gut and letting them explore independently are some valuable lessons indeed. Keep up the amazing work, and remember to take care of yourself too amidst all the chaos.
    -Anjali

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  7. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this article. Being a mom of two, I understand that there's a lot of difference between the upbringing of younger and older children.

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  8. Thank you for sharing your incredible journey as a twin mom! It's heartwarming to read about your experiences and the valuable lessons you've learned. Your honesty and positivity shine through in your words.

    I can relate to the emotional rollercoaster of motherhood and the different challenges that come with each child. Your emphasis on connecting with your babies, creating a baby-friendly environment, and trusting your instincts is so important. It's clear that you're a loving and dedicated mother, and your twins are lucky to have you.

    Your practical tips on swaddling, establishing a sleep schedule, and tandem breastfeeding are invaluable for other moms in similar situations. It's inspiring to see how you've adapted and grown through this journey, and your perspective on embracing life's challenges is truly commendable.

    Your positive outlook and focus on creating a happy, connected family environment are something many can learn from. Thank you for sharing your story and insights. Keep cherishing those precious moments with your twins! 💜

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Moni for your appreciation. Tight hug🤗

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