OBSESSION 2025

My obsession of this year : Being alone.

Yes!

I guess after crossing 40, we all feel it. We don't want to fight. We don't want to prove anything. We don't want to think about what other people think. We don't want to have any expectations from anyone. Literally anyone. And we don't want to depend on anyone emotionally.

Have you reached this stage yet?

Now I can understand why my mother used to be silent. When didn't she want to express her emotions? Why she loves to be alone. When we siblings were young, we often asked her, but she smiled and said, "I am happy the way I am."

I understand now. What is it?

Or why do we choose to be alone?

Once you crossed 40, you realized what kind of people are in your family. You consider them as a family, but everyone is different and has their own way to process life.

So here I am.

Alone with my kids. I have enjoyed my life with my kids. You can say I am a single mother. I have a healthy husband who provides us money, food, and shelter, and I am truly grateful to him.

And accept that he is too busy. Instead of making life more complicated, I think being a single mom is OKAY.

Family, especially my siblings—we used to talk a lot and love each other too much. But when talks become disputes, I choose to be silent. Because I realized once your brother married, their brain is not going to work by themselves. 😆

So just be your own. No talks, no more meetups, and no more obligation of anything.

Next come our friends, especially close friends; it may be either two or three, whatever it is. But after crossing 40, you mostly need your friends to hang out or burst out or just to be who you are. But if they are too busy, then you have to choose being alone.

That teaches you how you can take over your life by yourself. How you can handle every stress of your life by yourself.

Don't beg them to be with you, but don't rely on them too much that they will listen or be available for you. Because they might have been going through the same patch of life.

My obsession of this year is being alone.

Which literally gives me peace. In our life what matters is our family, our siblings, and our one or two close friends. But as you grew old, everyone started to be their own. They have busy lives. So accept that.

This post is created for #BlogchatterWrapParty 2025. 

 

ADOPTION

Adoption means बाळ किंवा छोटे मूल दत्तक घेणे. या गोष्टीला सहसा कोणी तयार होत नाही. म्हणजे बरेच लोक घेतात दत्तक पण सामान्यपणे मराठी लोक तयार होत नाही दत्तक घेण्यासाठी.

माझ्या नातेवाईकांमध्ये आणि बऱ्याच फ्रेंड्सरेकल मधे सुध्दा मूल नसण्याचे प्रमाण जास्त आहे. पण तरीही ही लोक अनाथाश्रमातून मूल दत्तक घेण्यास तयार नसतात. कारण बरेच वेळा emotional असते आणि प्रॅक्टिकल नाहीत. मला खरच कळत नाही की का लोक दत्तक घ्यायला तयार नसतात? ते जर रक्ताचे कारण असेल तर मात्र ते विचित्र वाटते. आपल्या सगळ्यांचे रक्त लाल रंगाचे असते. आणि कोणत्याही तर्क मांडण्याआधी त्या बाळाचा काय दोष? हा सुद्धा विचार करायला हवा ना?

मी काही उदाहरण सांगते.

माझ्या पापांचे एक मित्र होते. त्यांना 13 वर्ष मूल नव्हते. नंतर एक बाळ झाले पण तेही जेमतेम 5 वर्ष जगले. पण या दाम्पत्यानि बाळ दत्तक घेतले नाही. घरची श्रीमंती सुध्दा होती. माझा मुद्दा एवढाच की एखाद्या बाळाचं आयुष्य छान असते.

माझी एक फ्रेंड सुध्दा आहे. तिच्या लग्नाला तर 20 वर्ष झाली पण एकदाही तिला मूल दत्तक घेण्याची इच्छा झाली नाही. मी बरेच वेळा suggestions दिले पण तिची कारणे हीच कोणाचे रक्तं असेल?

माणसाची नियत चांगली हवी आणि पुण्य करायला पण हिम्मत लागते. मला 3 मुली आहेत. जर फक्त एक मूल असते तर मी नक्कीच दत्तक घेणार होते.

Kristin हे एक इंस्टाग्राम चे account आहे. हि स्त्री मूळची अमेरिकन पण तिला स्वतःच्या 3 मुली असून पण तिने एका अपंग मुलीला दत्तक घेतले. ऑपरेशन करून तिला नवीन पाय बसवले आणि तिला एक Happy Life दिली. खरच खूप छान वाटतं ते बघून.

तुमचं काय मत आहे? जर घरची financial condition चांगली असेल तर दत्तक जरूर घ्यावे. ह्या मुलांना सुद्धा education and good Life जगण्याचा हक्क आहे.

Disclaimer: Each parent is unique and have different way of thinking. This is my opinion. 

But for the sake of Kids future if we parent do such good deeds it will definitely change someone's life.

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SUNSET FROM MY BALCONY

Writing is the only thing that keeps me happy. And it's almost been 8 to 9 months; I didn't open my Blogger dashboard. 

When I saw this #blogchatterhalfmarathon activity, I decided to participate. Just want to give it a try because I wanted to get back to my writing journey. And here I am completing my 9th post by using a prompt. Thank you, Blogchatter.

Prompt: Look out of the window. Which things fascinate you and why?

One of the most beautiful and fascinating sights from my balcony is SUNSET. It is filled with orange color. It paints the cloud almost in lightish orange, and I saw it every evening with my twin kiddos.

My twin toddlers are very curious. They are constantly asking me, "Ata andhar ka jhala?" Why is there a blackout?

So I have to show them this sunset. Sun is saying goodbye to us and going to his home to meet his mummy. Again in the morning he will come to say good morning to us. And so watching sunset daily is an interesting activity for us as a family.

My favorite evening spot is sitting on the balcony with a cup of tea and a sunset. Many times I tried to capture the scenes, but it didn't capture the way we saw it.

I saw the sunrise at Kanyakumari, and that was blissful. Now I am blessed to watch the sunset daily right in front of me. But this time watching the sunset with the twin kiddos' perspective is different and vibrant.

I am really greatful for this. 

Question of the day 

Have you watched the sunset patiently? Do you like to watch sunrise or sunset?

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GREY HAIR

Grey hair is one of the beauty that we achieve after a certain age. My sister had grey hair when she was in 8th grade, and then she used to keep it like that only. After marriage she started to color it. I am having my first grey hair after crossing age 35. And feel yeaaa...a new beginning will start now.

Anyways, the topic of the blog post is how do you feel having grey hair?Actually, I don't feel weird. Yes, there are some people, friends, who stare at your grey hair and ask constantly, "You don't dye?"

I am lazy, or you can say I don't feel like dyeing it. Unless it is a marriage ceremony or any other family program. Mr. Husband and every elder one in my family called me and asked to dye my hair. And without opposing, I choose to die. Because there is no point in debating.

I love my grey hair too. It is a sign of a grown and mature person. 🤫 (Not all grown-ups are mature.)

But my in-law's, my father and mostly elderly people in my family all used to dye hair in a whole black patch. And I feel that weird. Okay. When you dye your hair, you look young, and your face structure glows. Agreed.

But,

Still, I don't feel like dying. I kept it as is.

I am a busy mom, and my hands are always full. But I like my grey hair. And also I like the way it looks. I am accepting the fact of my body. And I feel I look beautiful too.

So now tell me, do you like your grey hair? How do you feel it?

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जावई : अवघड जागेचे दुखणे

 जावई : अवघड जागेचे दुखणे 😆

ही म्हण मला आता समजायला लागली. खरंच ना, जावई हा प्राणी इतका विचित्र का असतो ?

मला तीन मुली आहेत तर स्वाभाविकच मला जावई असणार, hope की ते चांगले असतील ( means good human being) 🤞

बरं, या टॉपिक वर लिहायचा मुद्दा म्हणजे जावई या प्राण्याबद्दल असणारे कोडे. फ्रेंड circle आणि घरच्या siblings ना बघून हा लेख लिहिते. कदचित जावई हा प्राणी या प्रश्नांचे उत्तर देइल. नाहीं मुळात मला, उत्तरे नकोच आहेत पण एक प्रयत्न त्यांची मानसिकता सुधारण्याचा.

बरं, जावई या प्राण्याला इगो असा भयंकर असतो, का बरे? जॉब, फॅमिली, social status ani पैसा ! अरे हे सगळे बघूनच तर आमच्या आई वडिलांनी आमचे लग्न तुमच्यासोबत लावले. ते नसते तर लग्न झालेच नसते. हि गोष्ट तुम्ही लोक का विसरतात?

नवीन लग्न झालेल्या मुलीचा specially जावयाचा पाहुणचार तर खूपच भारी असतो. कारण parent's ना आपल्या मुलीची काळजी असते म्हणून.

यानंतर ही बरेच वेळा काळजीपोटी, आणि तिचा संसार टिकावा यासाठी तिचे आई वडील किती तरी गोष्टी डोळ्याआड करतात. इग्नोर करतात. पण खरंच या गोष्टीचा जावई या प्राण्याला अंदाज तरी असतो का ?

जावई हा प्राणी कसा आहे हे actually baby झाल्यानंतर कळते. तो पर्यंत सगळं छान असते. पण जेव्हा मूल जन्माला येते तेव्हा मात्र आई आणि बाबा या दोघांचा खरा स्वभाव कळतो. आणि सगळ्यात महत्वाची गोष्ट म्हणजे तुम्हाला तुमच्या आई वडिलांनी कसे संस्कार दिले हे ही दिसून येते.

पाहिजे तसे घालून पाडून बोलणे, घर सोडून जा, शिवीगाळ करणे, हात उचलणे, स्वतः बायकोला पोसतो याची जाणीव करून देणे आणि बऱ्याच गोष्ठी समोर येतात. मुळात डोमेस्टिक violence सुरू होतो. अगदी दोघे नवरा बायको वर्किंग असले तरीही.

का ?

काय गरज पडते?

एकदा इगो बाजूला ठेवून नीट बोलून बघावे.

काय गरज पडते मोठ्या माणसानं या सगळया गोष्टीत सहभागी करायची? आणि मुळात divorce हे हत्यार जावई या प्राण्याचे आई वडील का वापरतात?

या सगळया गोष्टी अजूनही समजत नाही. प्रत्येक बायको या सगळया त्रासातून जाते. बायको तुमची, तुमच्या मुलांची आई तरीही इतक्या लेवल पर्यंत नाते का जाते?

खरंच जर जावई प्राणी हे वाचत असेल तर नक्कीच सांगा, का तुम्ही असे वागता?

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Disclaimer: Out of 100, there are 70% cases are like this.  This post is for that people. 

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BOOKS FOR BABIES AND TODDLERS

 Hello parents, This is one of the most requested posts. Often I received questions about what kind of books we choose for babies and kids. In this post I am going to share with you the type and the sequence of books from babies to kids.

I am the mother of three girl children, and I developed reading habits in my elder one as well as now my babies (they are not babies anymore),  are preschoolers, by using these books.

SOME IMPORTANT POINTS 

1. Babies cannot read on their own. Just give them exposure.

2. It is not necessary to read the book. If they're turning the page, let them.

3. Always start reading with the name of the book and the author of the book.

4. It is okay to re- read the same book thousands of times.

5. Books should not be read only at specific times. It can be anytime and anywhere.

THE LIST OF THE BOOK FOR BABIES/TODDLERS

HIGH CONTRAST BOOK

When your baby is small, their eyesight is not fully developed. These are specially designed for babies in black and white contrast shades. 

You can DIY them or take printables from Google. Introduce these books as soon as possible. These are best for tummy time.

CLOTHES BOOKS

The second one is a clothes book. When your baby started to crawl or put everything in the mouth stage, these books were really useful. Because they are made up of clothes, so you can use them. These are soft, and parents do not need to worry about mouthing.

BOARD/PICTURE BOOKS

These are our favorites. Colorful, with pictures and small words. These board books include picture books, storybooks, concept books, etc. These are really good. It helps to improve visuals as well as vocabulary too.

TOUCH AND FEEL BOOK:

These are soft books. Inside, the books have different kinds of material, like fluffy, silk, furry, feathery, etc. Each material is described with the picture. Like flowers are silky, rabbits' ears are fluffy, etc.

These are must-have books for your toddler especially.

INTERACTIVE BOOKS

These are specially designed for extra curious toddlers. Books' pages have moving parts. For example, monkeys on swings—then in this interactive book you can move the swings by your hand. If there is rain, then you can actually move the raindropslike this.

Precautions should be taken, as these books should be handled in the presence of parents. If you allow them to read on their own, then they will tear it as fast as they can 😆. My personal experience.

STORY BOOK (one or two lines)

Yes, you can introduce a story now to your babies. Just take the books that have daily concepts through stories with one or two lines, and everything is described in pictures. This way toddlers' imaginations work strongly. And it also widens their brains.

NURSERY RHYMES BOOKS:

Yes, I personally feel this book should be in your library. Nursery rhyme books are very well illustrated, and toddlers watch the words and pictures too. I love this Nursery Rhymes book.

CONCLUSION:

My house is filled with books, and I used to read them since they were babies. Of course the first condition is you have to read your book; then only babies or your kids will love to read books. Be flexible and give more exposure of books to kids. Join groups or follow pages for books. You can find really good deals on books.

Question of the Day 

Mention your favourite list of kids books. 

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DIWALI FARAL AT EVERY STAGE OF LIFE

दिवालीचा फराळ

आपल्या लहानपणीच्या खूप आठवणी आहेत या दिवाळीच्या फराळाच्या, नाहीं का?

मला तर आठवते आम्ही सगळे फॅमिली मेंबर एकत्र बसून रात्र भर फराळ बनवायचो. करंजी, शंकरपाळी, लाडू, शेव, चकली, चिवडा, आणि अनारसे हे आमचे ठरलेले फराळाचे पदार्थ. रात्रीचे दोन तीन वाजेपर्यंत सगळे मिळून डबा भर फराळ बनवायचो. आणि तो ही किलोभर!

ही अशी दिवाळी माझे लग्न होईपर्यंत मी enjoy केली. लग्नानंतर नवीन घरात मला तरी बऱ्याच अपेक्षा होत्या. पण सासूबाई फक्त आजूबाजूला वाटण्यासाठीच बनवण्याच्या आणि त्याही माझ्या घरासारख्या टेस्टी नाही. 😶 आपल्या जिभेला एक चव लागली तर तीच रेंगाळत राहते, नाही का?

आणि त्यात इथल्या लोकांना खाणे माहितच नाही. आमच्याघरी तरी फराळ संपेपर्यंत तोच breakfast असायचा. यांच्या घरी अगदी दिवाळीच्या दिवशी सुद्धा चहा चपाती लागते. 😐😑 ते सगळे मला अजीब वाटले पण मी काहीच बोलली नाही. माझ्या मते या घरात मी एकमेव फराळ खाणार खादाड प्राणी होते.

असो, जेव्हा मी माझ्या घरी शिफ्ट झाले तेव्हा मात्र मला एकटीला फराळ बनवायला लागला होता. कारण नवरा म्हणजे अजीब प्राणी, त्याला काहीच बनवता येत नव्हते or else त्याला help नसेल करायची.

पंपांचे फोनवर फोन नुसते, झाली का तयारी? करणार ना फराळ? Bla....bla...bla...

मग काय You Tube matcehi जय, तसा फराळ मी कधीच एकटीने बनवाल नव्हता. नेहमी मी आईला हेल्प करायची त्यामुळे मोजमाप काहीच माहित नव्हते.

आणि पहिल्या वेळी मी करंजी बनवली खूप छान झाली. अगदी माझी मम्मी बनवायची तशीच. बस मग तर काय मी हवेतच उडत होते. You Tube बघून बघून शंकरपाळी, चिवडा आणि बिस्कीट बनवले. आणि माझ्या पप्पांना सुद्धा खूप आवडले.

लास्ट चार वर्षापासून तर मी फराळ बनवला नाही. ट्वीन pregnency आणि नंतर बाळंतपण आणि आता या दोघी काही करून देतील तर ना,

पण सण खूप चांगल्या प्रकारे मी साजरा करते. मुलांना पण सणसूद कळले पाहिजे की नको. तर मला तर खूपच हौस!

मी खूपच नशीबवान ☺️ या वर्षी मला अगदी घरच्यासारखा फराळ मिळाला. गरोदरपनात househelp होती. I am greatful for her🫰

आणि तिनेच या वर्षी सगळा फराळ बनवून दिला. Yummy 😋

एकच खंत ती म्हणजे आम्ही लहानपणी जसे डबे उघडून दिवसभर फराळ खायचो तसे माझी लेकरे खात नाही 😑 त्यांच्यासाठी खास बनवलं आणि दोन दिवसातच त्यांना कंटाळा आला.

तर असा हा फराळाचा प्रवास. कसा वाटला तुम्हाला? तुमचा कसा आहे दिवाळीचा फराळाचा प्रवास? कमेंट box सांगा.

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This post is a part of Blogchatter Half Marathon 2025 

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